How I left my job and changed career

DollyParton-9to5

A year ago today, I resigned from my ten-year teaching career. I remember it well, mainly because it was the day of Trump’s inauguration and I’d had no sleep the night before. I’d been planning on resigning later in the term (Benn and I had talked about me resigning the year before and agreed that the best time would be when D started school- no more nursery fees), but for some reason I found myself pouring out my thoughts to my line manager, who was amazingly supportive. I wrote my letter there and then, although I decided I would stay til the end of the year: this would give me time to sort myself out, but also I wanted to see my students through the year.

I then began to plan. I saved as much money (read: not much) as I could every month and joined agencies specialising in helping parents find work (spoiler: they were crap.) I spoke to people who could help me- one friend gave me really good advice about CVs. I researched, planned and saved. I’m not ashamed to admit that I was pretty terrified- I was leaving a job I’d done since I was 23, with relatively good money for the days I was in work (but not those I was working outside of school hours) and school holidays guaranteed. I had never looked for a job as a parent. Hell, I hadn’t seriously looked for a new job in eight years.

The time went REALLY fast. I took the summer off and started looking for work the week after D started school. I wrote a skills-based CV, which showed what I could do (and is easier to adapt for the skills required by each job description.) I also narrowed down the sort of places I wanted to work- charities, public sector- and signed up for job alerts. I scoured job boards for the NHS, the council, universities and the civil service. I applied for three jobs and was offered interviews for them all (I accepted the second job and got excellent feedback from the first. I didn’t attend the third interview.) I bought a basic black dress in the summer sales, which I wore with a plain cardigan (I felt like a younger Miss Marple, tbh), but it looked smart and presentable.

I was lucky in that I got a temp job for a few weeks, which brought in a bit of money, but I budgeted HARD. I cut all non-essential costs and used the library. During times when I wasn’t working, I kept myself busy: looking after the sheep, learning French, going to a free weekly knitting group.

I started my job in the public sector in December and it’s very different. I’m also working five days a week until the end of next month, which has brought a temporary boost in money but headaches with childcare. I’ll be a lot less well-off once I go down to three days, but better in terms of health. I sleep better, I’m happier and Benn and D have noticed a huge difference.

I have had to deal with an odd side-effect though: losing a sense of identity that was tied up with my job. It’s liberating and less scary now, but it’s definitely taken a while.

For anyone looking to change lanes, I will tell you it’s potentially hard- I was lucky that Benn was happy to pick up the slack, even if it means a change in lifestyle for us for a while- but the rewards can be utterly worth it.

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I’m leaving teaching

In just over two weeks, I will be stepping away from a career that has come to define my life- ten years, my identity, hours and hours of work just… gone.

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There are lots of reasons why, some much bigger than me and others that are more personal. You’ll know of the biggies: the workload (and a curriculum that I feel is deeply, deeply flawed and unfair), the pay and pension issues, the funding issues that mean we can’t do everything we need to do in order to make sure that those in our care are happy and healthy individuals who can think independently and creatively in a world that is becoming ever more challenging. Teaching has changed so, so much in the ten years that I’ve been doing it that I honestly can’t understand why people still want to train- and that those who have trained in the last couple of years seem to be told that it’s normal to be overworked, underpaid and to strive for constantly outstanding lessons, otherwise you’re a crap teacher. (I promise you, that last one cannot be done all the time if you want to have anything that resembles a work/life balance.)

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“A work/life balance, you say?”

On a personal level, I’m tired of the commute. I’m lucky enough to get a lift, so I’m not at the mercy of the railways, but it’s still exhausting. I’m tired of having to work when I get home; it’s not cool to be sat on the sofa when your 4 year old gets home and his face drops because you’re marking again and probably will be when he goes to bed. I’m often exhausted (and/or working) on the two days I week I have at home with him. Teaching is a job that never stops. For example, today I’m finding it very hard to not check my email. We are always contactable in a way that I never experienced early in my career. I have to mentally shut myself off from this if I am to get any work/life balance, otherwise I could drive myself mad- and I have done. I am pretty sure that most of the anxiety attacks I have experienced in the last few years have been as a direct result of work. I’m a good, conscientious worker; I hate letting down my colleagues and, most importantly, my students. I also want to be around to take D to school- leaving at 6.50am everyday isn’t the best thing for this.

So I’m going. I resigned in January (on the day of Trump’s inauguration, as it happens.) I’d had a tearful discussion with one of my bosses about it, (although I’d decided the previous May with Benn, in a Pizza Express on our anniversary, as he had picked up that I wasn’t happy and hadn’t been for a while. He asked me what I needed and said that he would support it.) I knew that I needed at least a break, if not something more permanent, otherwise I would be at risk of becoming one of those horrid, bitter and jaded teachers we all remember having. I genuinely adore most of my students and I didn’t want to inflict that on them. I mean, I’m a tired teacher, but I’m not a horrible one. I also knew that moving to a different school wasn’t an option. I just need to be out of a classroom.

Five months have flown by and I have no plans. This is a deliberate choice, for now. I wanted to keep giving my focus to the kids in my classes without worrying about other stuff. I also have the holidays to sort out my CV and interview skills (teaching interviews are unlike any others I have ever had. My last non-teaching interview was in 2005.) I also need some time to unwind and sort my head out; my identity has been so intertwined with my job that it’s going to take some time to sort myself out. I have been asked if I want to do supply/private tuition, to which my initial reaction is:

tumblr_ml2rlfaQC71s5ipdco1_400.gif At least for now. I need to focus on my own kid and getting him settled in school. Also, I really need a break on correcting people’s spelling. Never say never and all that, and I will miss my students, but for now I’m quite happy to leave teaching to other people.

People find it really hard when I tell them I have no plans. I mean, I’m not going to live off Benn (I managed to save a bit- so if you’ve invited me out recently and I’ve said I’m skint, you now know why…), but I am going to take some time to find something new. I have no idea what, yet, but I’m sure something will come up. And yes, I won’t have the holidays, but I will have my evenings and weekends back- 90% of parents cope with holidays, I’m sure we will too. It also means that if Benn’s office does finally get its long threatened move to Croydon, I’ll be around for D. We’ll just be reversing our roles a bit and I’m OK with that. I probably won’t have the same sort of wage, either, but you cut your coat according to your cloth and I’ve coped before- I’ll cope again. Right now, I’m looking forward to reading, writing, listening to music, all without a deadline.

But if you do see any jobs in Brighton, give me a shout, yeah?

Signing up for NaNoWriMo 2016

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Advert for Marquet Ink by Eugene Grasset (1892)

You know how I’m often COMPLETELY NOT BUSY? What with a teaching job, a 4-year-old and other things in my life (before even considering my hobbies and whatnot)? Well, I’ve signed up to do NaNoWriMo this year, too.

I’ve been sort of fruitlessly working on a novel idea since the summer; a mystery set in 1930’s Hollywood in which the most famous woman in the world goes missing, leaving only a trail of evidence that damns her unfaithful husband. I’ve been writing in longhand in notebooks, using my faithful Lamy Al-Star pen and hiding in cafes. But I kind of.. ran out of steam and then real life, a busy job and a ton of marking stopped me from getting on. I needed a kick up the bum, so I signed up for NaNoWriMo.

Now, I signed up a few years ago but ended up flaking out about two weeks in. However, this time I’m trying to be better. Firstly, I’m announcing it on my blog and Twitter. Feel free to nag me/ask for updates if you want. I might even blog my progress, who knows? Secondly, I’m going to give my desk a huge clear-out and maybe put some inspirational things on it (don’t laugh. I’m a visual person.) Finally, I’m going to forego my current Murder, She Wrote habit- I’m setting aside every night between 7.15-8pm to write during the week. D will be in bed (he never wants me to put him to bed, I’m ABSOLUTELY not insulted by this. Any more.) and I will have space to think. Weekends will be slightly different due to Strictly etc. I’m hoping that the discipline will become a habit that sticks with me. We’ll see.

Anyway- wish me luck!

The Bronte Project- the books

I’m a month into The Bronte Project- I’m currently reading Juliet Barker’s The Brontes, which Benn referred to as ‘a weighty tome’ (and it is- it’s 800 pages before you even get to the notes) and an edition of the stories Charlotte wrote, in conjunction with her brother, called Tales of Angria.

Tales of Angria - Penguin Classics (Paperback):

I thought I’d list the editions I’m using- although I have a couple of vintage editions of some of the non-fiction, which I’ve listed a newer version if you want to read along with me. None of these links are affiliates, by the way!

Novels-

Jane Eyre- Penguin Clothbound Edition

Wuthering Heights- Penguin Clothbound Edition

Agnes Grey- Wordsworth Classics-it’s really hard to find a pretty edition of Agnes Grey, which reminds me that Anne has an undeserved, neglected position in the Bronte legacy. It also reminded me of this comic by the brilliant Kate Beaton:

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The Tenant of Wildfell Hall- Penguin Clothbound Edition (I’ve pre-ordered this. Hurrah!)

Shirley- Penguin English Library

Villette-Penguin Clothbound Edition (my grandma has pre-ordered it for me for my birthday- it’s one of her favourite novels ever.)

The Professor-I have yet to buy a copy of this, so I’m not sure which edition I will end up buying (I’m allowed to break my book buying ban for the Bronte Project!)

Non-Fiction

This section may well expand as I discover new books, but at the moment I have on my bookshelves:

The Bronte Myth- Lucasta Miller

The Infernal World of Branwell Bronte- Daphne du Maurier (I have an old edition- 1960s?- of this)

The Life of Charlotte Bronte- Mrs Gaskell My edition of this is from 1905, so I will probably borrow another edition from the library; I can’t remember if the print is tiny in my book.

Charlotte Bronte- Claire Harman  This will be another book I get from the library.

This is not meant to be an exhaustive list by any means! However, it’s a good resource for anyone who might want to read along, or to dip in and out of Bronteana in a year which is important for Bronte readers and scholars (it’s the 200th anniversary of Charlotte’s birth.) Let me know if you have any thoughts, recommendations or if you’d like to read along with me!

Resolutions for 2016

Good morning, Sunshine- welcome to 2016!

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I’ve been thinking about resolutions. They have to be a) quite easy and b) quite quick to achieve some kind of result because I am essentially lazy and have the willpower of a small child. Also, I don’t believe in detoxes and all that jazz (despite owning books with titles like ‘I Quit Sugar’! Which is hilarious, as it ain’t ever gonna happen.)

Anyway, so I was thinking about what I wanted to achieve in terms of small, manageable goals and this is what I came up with:

  1. Declutter the house. I’ve actually started this already, but it’s definitely an ongoing process, especially with a three year old. I’m going to try and be ruthless with books, clothes and other things- and I’ll be looking at D’s stuff to root anything out that he’s too big for. No doubt most of the stuff will go to charity shops, but as it is a rolling thing, I may do a few car boot sales and eBay auctions too.
  2. Go veggie for a month. I’ve been vegetarian, on and off, since my teens. The reason I want to do this now is not so much a ‘post-Christmas detox’, but more about making me (and my family) a bit more adventurous when it comes to cooking vegetables. Benn is not keen on joining me in this, as he’s training for a marathon and is a massive carnivore. I, on the other hand, don’t eat that much meat, but I’m not varied in the vegetables I eat. Plus, this will give me an idea for what I’d like to grow in the garden this year. I’m open to this becoming a more permanent thing, but think that a month is a manageable start.
  3. Buying bans. Ack, I hate this term, but I can’t think of another term. I’m going to stop buying books (which I’ve done before, with some success) and yarn. You can read about how I’m going to go about a book buying ban on my book blog, but in terms of my yarn buying ban, I have to use my stash as much as possible. I’ll talk about this in a future blogpost.

I think three resolutions is enough for now. I like to see the year as a work in progress and that resolutions are not set in stone. We’ll see how it goes.

What are your resolutions?

Finally- I’d like to wish you a happy, peaceful 2016.

 

Teaching myself Spanish with Flashsticks*

Hola!

I’m learning Spanish with a system called Flashsticks and so far I’ve taught D to say ‘Hello, my name is…’ and ‘I like fish’. Which, I’m sure you’ll agree is pretty impressive for an almost two-and-a-half year old, even if the latter phrase isn’t particularly useful (unless he’s enthusing about why he’s watching Finding Nemo for the 73rd time to a confused Spanish person.)IMG_20150224_165719

This is the sight that greets me as I walk into my workroom- and the Flashsticks post-its are plastered on the other side of the bookcase and trailing up the staircase too. It’s safe to say that Benn hasn’t got a clue what’s going on. (So business as usual on that score then.)

What I like about this way of learning a language is that it works very much in the same way as I encourage my own students to revise- each post-it is colour coded according to whether it’s masculine, feminine or a verb or other word.

The pronunciation is broken down and- rather snazzily- you can download an app that scans the note and a very nice Spanish lady pops up and shows you how to pronounce the word correctly. It was like something out of the Jetsons the first time I tried that! D, au fait with modern technology already, simply copied what she said.

So- do I rate Flashsticks so far? Well, I’m using the beginner’s pack and as I have very little Spanish, I’m finding it quite useful. Some words I know, but needed to develop my pronunciation and Flashsticks is helping. All I can say is: sorry in advance to the media technician and the head of Spanish at work and my Spanish dentist. I’ll be practising my pidgin Spanish on you all at every opportunity.

*Priced at £4.99 for 200 words, this pack was sent for review

Zombies, Run! 5K Week 6

Image: New Scientist

Image: New Scientist

This is slightly behind where I wanted to be in my blog updates, as I was a bit behind; I had to stop during my first attempt at workout 1 of the week due to cramp and then work stuff meant I didn’t get out when I wanted. However, despite week 6 ALMOST KILLING ME (not really, but it was hard!), I survived and have started week 7.

So what can I tell you about week 6? Well, it was brutal. Lots of longer running and squats. In public. I am not an unkind person and decided to walk these sections and do the squats at home. I doubt the good people of Brighton would have wanted my bum in their front windows. I also made sure I did more hill walking to counteract the fact I wasn’t squatting.

Two things happened this week too- my average distance went to 6k and I also had the best run of my running career so far. I can’t explain what made it so, but I felt brilliant afterwards and like I’d really achieved something. My plan is that next Saturday, which will coincide with the end of the 5k training, I will bite the bullet and do Hove park run. Benn has been doing it for years and has nagged me to give it a go for a while. He’s even bought me a running jacket, which is possibly the most romantic thing he’s done for me this year.

Week 6

Distance: 20.25km

Time: 3:00:50