How many times have you given your friends encouragement and compliments, only to find yourself being unnecessarily harsh towards yourself? I find myself doing this quite often. I would never, ever say the things I say to myself about myself to my friends- or even someone I didn’t like. It’s not self-depreciation, it’s a vicious cycle and it’s not cute (unlike the beagle puppy at the top of this post.)
So, how to overcome this? Well, I was inspired recently by my friend Jaqui, who stuck up for herself at work in a way that I would never have the guts for. She detailed exactly what she was good at, why she deserved recognition for this and why she felt she’d been overlooked. I WAS SO PROUD.
How do we channel our inner cheerleader, then? Think of the skills we have, for a start. Think you have no skills? Now is not the time to be shy: you are currently living, you do stuff and you have things that you’re good at. You don’t have to talk to other people about it-yet- and you can make a private list. Hopefully, this will start making you think more positively about yourself; then, the next time you try to beat yourself up about something, you can remember something else that will hopefully stop you from being so negative.
It’s not an easy process to start with, but I find that it’s a mechanism I’m using a bit more regularly. I find it helps me to stop spiralling into a negative thought process and the mental paralysis I can sometimes find myself a victim of.
Have you got any tips for this sort of thing?